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wow... it's been a while since anything's made it over here.

guess i haven't really had time or demon enough to post. and maintaining this blog on top of the other fast jump, SN sites just doesn't fit the schedule.

i suppose from time to time i may stop in to beat the proverbial rug and shoo out what haunts me. but if any hitchhikers come across this place and wish to fill in any gaps of what one such as i get up to, head on over to myspace, or facebook, or trig.com. i'm there from time to time, updating promotional and lifestyle antics.

but as i said... from time to time the rug gets beaten.


i've had countless dreams lately. you know who you are. the majority mirror the current state. but time and again there is a glimmer of bygones... but why even question what the ripples mean? i think i'll just let that stone sink.

and as the discarded thoughts and accomplishments of the days cast overboard, the bottom will go murkier and murkier.

still there. sometimes fossilized. until they're found again.


i think he's drowned him. but one can never be sure, what swims just below the surface.

been a while, but a man divided... finds philanthropy! give if you can, post the banner code (available here), point your friends.


Chance to WIN TICKETS, while donating to charity! Courtesy of HIDDEN FORMS.

*ATTENTION: These are CHICAGO dates!*

shut up.

i told you so.

i told you so.

we told you so.


i hear someone's out to get me. can't say i blame them. can't say i fear them. p2 wants to tell them i'm sorry. he never meant for it to happen. 36 wants to dare them to try. almost hoping they'll do their worst. me? i'm stuck watching it all unfold. hoping someone special realizes she is, and deserves as much of the world as the rest of us.

there are still many things left unsaid. but i've already written the end to the story. and when that happens, it's never wrong. and it's always the only thing i can ever keep for myself.


where did you go?

sometimes it gets the best of me.

wish there was something i could do.

you already did.

what would you have of me?

why is it always, and never forever?

i don't know which to cage. they won't stop arguing. the only way to get them to notice i'm even here is do something drastic... desperate. but it does no good. they just go right back to it. that is, after parting with a few choice words at me, as if they didn't care "i" was where "they" lived.

guess they know now that to get rid of them, is to undo me well. that is... if it were without your help.


where must things go, when monday forgets to show?

i've missed certain pieces of me for some time now.

taking the logical route,
starting from the outer edges,
working inward,
my boundaries being more defined.
absolute.

as the layers creep toward center,
the shapes become less obvious.
blind.

but different now,
at least for a short while.
through new eyes,
i see the center.
with no idea how to join the two.

blind again.

but this time,
with the hope my eyes will see again.

this time,
only for you.

been a while. but i haven't forgotten.

so i'll visit from time to time. inside.
until it's finished.

for now, i'll play this game with time.

you'll never hear it.
so it's here.
and it fits.

but you really don't need to care.



"the world is growing loud.
it's time for us to fade
to grey.
i wish they'll let us stay.

the lights are going out.
we knew we had to go
one day.
i wish they'll take us in.

the skies are falling down.
too late for us to change
our minds.
i wish they'll keep us safe.

the times are changing fast.
we knew we wouldn't last
this long.
i hope they'll keep the pace.

the world is growing loud.
it's time for us to fade
away.
i wish they'll let us stay."

funny how we borrow, steal, or absorb something from those we let in.

with a little luck, it's positive. we evolve.

but still, die a little.